By Myself

Dear Reader,
     I used to always give a single reason for why I feel bad about myself. Now I jump from reason to reason trying to consider anything. I eventually just blame it all on myself because I think too much. It's dumb as fuck. I want to feel good about myself. I want to believe in myself. I want to have some pride. But almost every time I turn away from some people I second guess myself and feel like I'm the worst.
     fuck fuck fuck, Bard.

On Guilt

     The most irritating distraction that constantly scratches at the backside of my brain. It erodes away at all my free time. When I could be bettering myself but I'm too busy worrying about a mistake that doesn't even matter. My character isn't measured by my mistakes but by my resolve to get things done with no questions asked. But still every single time I have a panic attack I can't help but stop myself from worrying about everything in a dramatic fashion. Such that no one in their right mind would ever want to deal with it. I begin to question my purpose in this world. What a waste of time you know? I could be changing the world with every little action and it would make up for all the mistakes I ever made many times over. But I'll tell you one thing... I'd really like it if StarCraft II were never to have been released... I want my Brood War back.